The above photo makes me smile every time I see it (thanks Bethanie Hines Photography). It reflects the beauty, support, community and commitment to my calling that 2019’s path-through-the-wilderness brought. That’s what our life feels like sometimes right? Wilderness. And when we finally see a clear path opening up, we tend to break out into a full sprint! Before you go all Allyson Felix (the Olympic sprinter that broke Usain Bolt’s world record just 10 months after giving birth) for 2020, I’m going to ask you to slow your roll.
At the beginning of a new year, well sometimes at the beginning of a new anything, we tend to speed up, avert our eyes and move swiftly past reflection toward what we fiercely hope will be a better experience. If we do spend quiet time alone reflecting (or with girlfriends over wine or ice cream) the human in us tends to look back over the thing we just finished, a relationship/job/diet/year, and highlight what went wrong.
I knew what to do but didn’t do it… I kept saying I wouldn’t go back, but I did… I wouldn’t be in this situation if I’d spoken up… I felt stuck all year… Why am I starting off the year broke again? I tried that diet! Well kind of.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not suggesting that we should be in denial. However, I guarantee you’ve already beat yourself up about those things once, if not 10 times already! Allow yourself to heal from the wounds these situations have caused and the reopening of flesh from the harsh words said to you, by you.
I’m encouraging the Divine in you to consider reflecting on your past year in the following ways:
Ask yourself:
What were the joy-filled, funniest or fun moments of 2019?
In what ways was I a BADASS? or for those of you who don’t have a potty-mouth like me, In what ways did I SLAY?
When did I show up as the best version of myself?
What did I learn last year?
What opportunities were offered to me (whether I accepted or not)?
What am I grateful for?
Sit a moment in stillness, pull out a pen and paper (or prepare to type) and come up with 3 to 10 things for each. Yes, you will be able to! Here are some other ways to remind yourself (please don’t go down a rabbit hole with these, give yourself a time limit of 15 min to review):
Ask your friends or mentors (often they remember things that you have glossed over)
Look over your 2019 social media posts
Go through your 2019 calendar (online, phone or paper)
Whether you are celebrating the birth of a savior, principles to live by, the miracle of light, or a new year, have you made space to welcome in the new?
December 21st was the last Winter Solstice of the decade! What does that mean? For me it brings to mind a Maori proverb that I love: Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you.
The last long period of darkness is behind us so that we may welcome, expect and create LIGHT.
However, there has been something nagging at me lately. Many (myself included at times), are so willing to make that fast pivot toward the light that we completely miss the deep wisdom and growth darkness has to offer.
In this post, I’m gifting you a powerful Declaration AND an exercise to clear space within so that it may root.
?✨Happy New Year!✨?
Start 2020 worth a powerful Declaration (written and audio) AND an exercise to clear space within so that it may root!
A Declaration of Elevation I declare grace over your life: that the words from your mouth land softly and your thoughts are loving and gentle that your strides are long and sure…
To claim the rest of your declaration, click the link below! Comment and let me know how you used this in your life.
Kwanzaa is my favorite holiday but I celebrate all year long. I’d love for you to join me on Instagram or Facebook for #KwanzaaForSuccess and leave a comment.
Nia (Purpose): To make our collective vocation the building and developing of our community in order to restore our people to their traditional greatness. This building & developing must take place within first. Me walking in my purpose can’t help but to positively affect those around me. When I know my reason for being (at the moment because yes, it changes) and then CHOOSE to move inside of it, I AM GREAT. Which means, WE are great.
If you’d like to learn more about the holiday, this is the official website. Happy Kwanzaa and Happy Holidays!
Whether you are celebrating the birth of a savior, principles to live by, the miracle of light, or a new year, have you made space to welcome in the new?
December 21st was the last Winter Solstice of the decade! What does that mean? For me it brings to mind a Maori proverb that I love: Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you.The last long period of darkness is behind us so that we may welcome, expect and create LIGHT.
However, there has been something nagging at me lately. Many (myself included at times), are so willing to make that fast pivot toward the light that we completely miss the deep wisdom and growth darkness has to offer.
In this holiday email, I’m gifting you a powerful Declaration AND an exercise to clear space within so that it may root.
Excavation Exercise
I believe our pain, feelings and thoughts take up physical and mental space in our bodies. Depending on the depth and age, this energy can become toxic. Let’s be clear, this exercise doesn’t magically erase everything but it can be a powerful process of awareness, acknowledgment and release.
You can use this as journaling, meditation or mirror work. Whatever best allows you to go deep and return refreshed. First create time and space to be alone and reflective. Take several deep breaths. Answer these questions honestly and gently. When finished, I encourage you to give your self what it needs (more deep breathing, a good cry or yell, shake out your body, water, prayer, etc) and then immediately read the Declaration of Elevation. Let’s begin:
Ask yourself:
What am I angry about?
What am I sick of?
For who/what am I grieving?
Who have I been unkind to?
What promises did I break?
What do I need to forgive?
In all of this, what am I grateful for?
A Declaration of Elevation
I declare grace in your life:
that the words from your mouth land softly
and your thoughts are loving and gentle
that your strides are long and sure
while your stumbles are quickly righted and learned from
that your way is safe and protected
I declare ease in your life:
that your best path is brightly lit
and courage meets you at every step forward
that you are supported with helping hands and fast feet
that resources show up before stress
that if you fall there are shoulders to cry on
and encouragers to lift you up
I declare prosperity for you:
that your needs are met and your desires are provided for
that you give from your own overflow
and it is easily replenished
that you know your worth and others see your value
that you manage your wealth from a sense of abundance rather than lack
I declare health in your body:
that you look in a mirror and celebrate your body temple AS IS
that you move with ease and strength
that your healing is swift and constant
that your being renews itself healthier than before
I declare love:
that thrive instead of survive love
that Agape/Oneness love
that intimate feel-good love
that laugh-until-you-cry-with-friends love
that self-first, I AM love
that deep connection with a being larger than you love
I declare a blessing over your life
one that goes before you
enfolds you
and is there in your wake
~And so it is
~Ase
I’d love to know if/how you used this, comment and let me know
Hey family, I recently received some devastating news (I didn’t address this wrong, I consider you and the rest of my community family).
I was trying to come up with some great success tool to accompany the announcements at the bottom of this email but I have to be real about the waves of grief I’ve been caught in this week.
My beautiful, talented, powerhouse friend of 20+ years, Renee Puckett (above photo on my right in blue), passed suddenly on Saturday. If you were at Activate Your Calling in 2018, you may remember her sharing, had lunch with her or connected during group work. I don’t have many words right now but to say, I know some of you are grieving as well. And if you aren’t, you probably know someone who is. I saw this graphic on Facebook and thought it was spot on. Please use it or share it.
You know what? I also have these words:
Quit playin. There is no time. You Don’t. Have. Time. To keep holding back
your deep love from yourself and others because you might get hurt (so!)
on getting over petty shit
on forgiving yourself
your gifts because you’re too damn scared (we’re all scared, do it)
because of MONEY smh
the expansive light given to you by the creator
Renee didn’t hold back. She never did. I’m so grateful for this reminder. May the ancestors welcome her like the queen she is.
Please excuse grammar/spelling, I don’t feel like editing.
In my private Facebook group, Powerhouse Women Rising, we did a book club discussion of Oprah Winfrey’s new book, The Path Made Clear. It’s been really good. At first I thought I was going to be a little dismissive and not really like it, but once I knew the book was small and that it wasn’t all Oprah’s writing (she actually invited a lot of people to contribute)—it was rich, it was so good.
This is a really good tool that I feel like everybody can use in their everyday. It can absolutely turn your energy, your vibration and how things are happening in your life on a daily basis.
In this book, she is inviting a bunch of people to step in. We went through all of the quotes, we discussed some of the philosophies, some of the things about, well, how does this happen. It’s been about the flow and about how once you get into the flow, you know what happens then.
Oprah brought Joel Osteen in for this small part. I’m going to quote this piece really quick and then give you my views on it, which is a quick little takeaway that you can use in your daily life.
Osteen says, “What follows ‘I am’ is what we’re inviting into our life.” When you say, ‘I am tired, I am frustrated, I am lonely’, well now you’ve invited in more of that. So the principle is to turn it around and invite what you want into your life, there’s a balance to it. I don’t think you’re denying the facts, you’re just not magnifying the negative.” Let me say that again, “You are not magnifying the negative. Rather start saying, ‘I am a masterpiece, I am fearfully and wonderfully made, I am strong, I am talented. I think that is speaking to the core of what God’s put in each one of us. God has equipped us, God has empowered us, we have what we need to fulfill our destiny but we have to bring it out and you can’t bring it out by being against yourself.
Now I think he says this plainly and clearly, and it’s like, what are you talking about? These are just words. So the truth is, the two words, “I am” hold a lot of power. They hold a lot of power in an energy sense and they hold a lot of power in a very spiritual sense. They hold a lot of power within a lot of different cultures and in ancient texts.
And so, without getting too deep into it, the truth is that even if we’re just speaking on a plain level of everyday speaking, we have a strong mind body connection that we aren’t really tuned into anymore. You are not just saying this stuff. We say “I am” all the time, right? And usually we say “I’m”. Just because you’re making it a contraction don’t change the energy. What you’re saying is “I am” and when you say “I am”, you are putting an invitation out into the universe.
So we do that all the time, like, “Oh god, I’m so stupid! Why did I do that?” Or you know, “Oh! I’m such a loser! I can’t believe I just did this!” And I’m guilty of this too! My thing is sleep. This is a practice of mine, so I’m usually very very good about this, but I might say, “Oh I’m so exhausted”, or “Oh, I’m a insomniac.”
It’s the mind/body thing. It’s what you’re saying to yourself. Your body listens to you, your spirit listens to you. Your subconscious is taking everything from your conscious and using it to create programs for your life.
The other piece is, when you say “I am”, you are also speaking it out into the world, and people hear that and take it in. Doesn’t matter if you’re just playing, doesn’t matter if “all your energy is light”, “I was just saying a little something”. You are saying, “I am.” You are making an invitation and you are also showing people what you believe about yourself; you are showing people what you believe about yourself whether you want to or not. Especially children and especially people that look up to you without you even knowing it. When you say, “I am”, people might say, “Oh, you crazy.” But you know what? The energy in the words, “I am stupid”, goes into their mind and is connected to you. There is a very personal reason to pay close attention to these two words in your life; there’s an inner reason and an external reason as well as a very spiritual reason.
And so I have four simple questions for you to ask yourself, because I want you to know how powerful this is.
It’s super simple. Number one is just really easy: simply becoming aware of when you’re saying “I am”. So it’s nothing more to do except to say to yourself, “Oh, I just said I’m _____.” For example, I just said, “I’m old”, or “Oh I’m getting slow.” Or, “Ohh, I’m fat!” Number one is just to become really aware of when you’re saying, “I am.”
Number two: ask yourself, is it true? If somebody could write a book on all of the things that comes out of our mouths, you would be amazed to read that text. Did I say that? I said that? So number two is to ask yourself, is it true? “I’m so stupid!” Is that true? Only you know. Ask yourself, is what I’m saying out loud to myself and to other people actually true?
Number three: is this something I want to invite into my life? Remember, “I am.” I want you to think of that as an evite on evite.com. Every time you say, “I am”, you are pushing “send” on an evite in the universe. You are inviting people, you are inviting energy, really—you are inviting the universe to give you opportunities, you are inviting your body to interpret what you said, you are making an invitation into your life. And so, I want you to ask yourself: is what I just said something that I want to invite more of into my life?
Number one, become aware, number two, ask yourself is it true what I just said? Number three, ask yourself is this something that I actually want to invite into my life?
Number four is where we get to the good part. What can you invite instead? Remember Joel Osteen. I think you can say instead, “I’m a masterpiece; I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am strong, I am talented.” If you can bring yourself to say that, if you can put those affirmations somewhere—that is awesome. Do it.
As a coach and as a scholar of physical and spiritual transformation, I would encourage you to invite something into your life that you already have the doors open to. And sometimes we don’t quite have the doors open to, “I am wonderfully made. I am a millionaire. I am the attractor of the greatest love life.” Honestly, that stuff sounds good, but the doors in your heart and your mind and in your spirit aren’t quite open yet to that. So I would encourage you to invite in something that you have actually turned the knob and opened the door to a little bit.
For example: I would say, “Oh, I’m a night owl.” But truth be told, I don’t want to invite that into my life! So, number one: I’m becoming aware of it. I do say that. Number two is, ask yourself: is it true? I have been a night owl for most of my life. My father worked nights and I would stay up waiting for him; it’s a habit that has been in my life since I was a kid. So, is it true? Yes, it has been true. But I’ve been pulling my way out of it, so I can’t say that it’s true for me and my being.
Number three: is this something you want to invite in your life? No! I know where spirit is taking me and the impact that I’m having in my communities, and where I can continue to have it. I need sleep! I need way more sleep than I’ve been getting all these years. No, I don’t want to invite being more of a night owl into my life.
Number four: what can I invite instead? I mentioned earlier not to affirm something that you aren’t quite open to. That would be me saying, “I am a morning person.” I ain’t a morning person, I don’t even want to be a morning person. I ain’t interested. I like sleeping in the morning. I don’t have those doors open in my physical, spiritual, or mental body.
What I can say instead is, “I am such a good, sound, deep sleeper.” Do y’all see the difference in that? One is saying like I’m something that I ain’t about to be. The other is accepting and allowing. I’ve already opened the door to these things that I do want to invite in and expand into, and it fits with who I am and where I want to go. Again it’s all about the now, just like my company name: Elevate Your Now. We are always thinking about elevation and what we want in our goals. How do we bring those things, that expansion, that vibration, that incredible energy and feeling and goals into our lives now? Right now is the only moment we have.
Another thing I’m not going to say is, “I am late”, because I’m not. I ain’t early, but what am I going to say? You’ve got to think about this stuff. Because you want it to be real. You want it to be something that really fits and aligns with what it is that you want and are capable of doing. So, what I’m going to say is, “I am the type of person that gets to a place as soon as I need to be there and at the right time.”
How do you want to show up in the world? Your words and what you believe about yourself is who you are. What do I want to invite into my life?
I’m hoping this helps. Let me get out of here, because I am on time whenever I get there! Love y’all.
What does the journey look like when you feel the pull to be, do or have more than what you experience right now?
Stop right here for a second. Check in with how that sentence made you feel… Perhaps a bewildered, “I’m on it and I still don’t know!” OR an energized, “That’s what I’m trying to figure out.” OR a guilt-ridden, “I’m blessed, I shouldn’t want more than I already have”.
Hey no judgement here! In my experience, we’ve all felt one of these at different times in our lives. Often it’s at this point, staring (or peeking) into the unknown, that fear creeps up and takes over. The weight of not knowing, trying to figure it all out and wondering if you even deserve what you desire will have you trapped in your comfort zone for years. Yep, years.
I often talk to people who feel a longing for transformation and they want to know if what they feel is real.
“Am I really being called toward something? If I am, then what? I’m just not sure how or if it’s even possible.”
This is my short and sweet definition of the “Journey” of a Calling. See if you find yourself on the continuum; comment below and let me know where.
Being Called:
I am not going to lie, this can be tricky. I think when the Universe/Spirit/Intuition calls, it whispers on purpose. Why? Because you have to listen in order to hear a whisper. You must make enough space available between everybody and everything trying to grab your attention for the small sound to get through. And once you THINK you hear something, you must trust that you heard it. Thankfully, the whisper will continue until it seems like it’s shouting; In reality, you’ve only trained your ear to hear and trust the sound. Being called may ‘sound’ like coincidences, dreams, the same vision or thought over and over again, “Something said I should__”, opportunities showing up or simply a strong desire.
Being Activated:
One definition of activation is: the act of making something start or making it start working.This is taking the thing off the Vision Board and into your life. You may have lots of experience with this. Researching, getting a certification, choosing names and titles, starting a chapter, taking classes, telling everyone about it, doing two weeks of a 9 week plan, drafting an email, setting up a dating profile, signing up for a gym membership… Need I go on? For many, it’s a great start with good intentions, and then for any number of reasons, the fires burn out. Write this one down! The secret to this crucial part of the journey is Inner Activation. Mindset is a huge part of ‘making something start’. You must BE, before you do, in order to have, and sustain.
Being in Action:
Ahh, the sweet spot. Here, you are doing the thing, in the arena, hands dirty, full throttle (even with baby steps). This is where you (or others) experience fulfillment, results, outcomes and impact from the steps you are taking. In this part of the journey you’ve put something in place to encourage or ensure consistency. It could be systems, other’s expectations, a commitment, check-ins, partners and/or accountability.
Notice there’s no endpoint. Just like life, this journey is cyclical. While in Action you may feel yourself being called to elevate what you’re doing or eventually you’ll hear the call toward something else. It’s all good, it’s all life.
There are highs and lows in each section. You could be miserable while in Action. Some experience an extreme high in Activation. Being Called can be both exhilarating and scary as hell. Yep, life once again.
And as life will show you, it’s a beautiful thing.
I’m thrilled to say that no matter what part of the journey my clients find themselves experiencing, they’ve thrived with the expert guidance, transformative strategies and like-minded, powerful community of Alchemy.
Within the nine months of support Alchemy provides, you will:
Discover how to welcome, recognize and answer when you are being called, whisper or not.
Train and grow your muscle of Faith so that it is stronger than the fear that tries to keep you stuck.
Master decision-making and time management formulas to combat your overwhelm and exhaustion.
Form an inner circle of women that goes against the supposed norm: Noncompetitive, supportive, fun, inspired & smart.
Design a plan with achievable steps that align with your individual personality and life.
Finally put your plan in action with intention, accountability & guidance.
Create fulfillment in your life and impact in the world.
Learn from a coach who accepts you as you areAND will challenge, stretch, nurture, encourage and inspire you to be your most powerful divine self.
Doors are closing soon, we begin next week! If you are ready for your journey, click here to apply and we’ll be in touch soon. xo
“Sometimes we feel like we’re in life alone. Kysha was definitely a pivotal part in helping me at a time when I needed a friend, accountability, and a positive mindset to push me forward.” Alchemy 2019
“Thank you so much Kysha for these months in Alchemy. It has been an amazing and powerful life-transforming experience for me. Thank you for every session, every challenge, every tool, every resource, all of the encouragement, everything that you’ve provided.” Alchemy 2018
Almost 5 years ago when I made the decision to combine my words, 12 years of study and my heart on a blog for public consumption, it felt bold, terrifying… and necessary.
Every time I turned around, there was something related to what I wanted to do in my face. I would happen to see a book or magazine article that related. People would mention that they needed exactly what I was thinking about doing. Resources and encouragers showed up. It felt like everything was lining up except for ME.
I would decide on a date and then put it off. Write something and then tell myself there was no way anyone would read it. I’d sabotage myself by doing things for EVERYONE else until I was too tired to do my stuff.
2015 Vlog!
While stepping into the courage to start a vlog (translation: a blog with videos of me after testing 10 places in my house trying to find good light and taking 2 hours to make one 15 minute video), I had no idea it would turn into a thriving business that would positively touch the lives of hundreds of women.
Before starting:
I was deep in self-pity for what I believed were my “failures”.
I was exhausted all the time because I was always BUSY taking care of everything but my desires.
I knew I was blessed and constantly felt guilty for wanting MORE.
I had tons of ideas and balls in the air but PROCRASTINATION & FEAR kept me always “about to do something”.
I’m rehashing all of this to say, I know exactly what it feels like. To know in your heart that there is more waiting for you but frustrated because you’re not moving at all or not fast enough.
I am a Passionate Advocate for NOW
Listen. Next year, some day, one day, after I finish ______ and eventually is too damn far away. Life is too short and too exquisite to put off living out loud any longer.
What piece of your vision can you engage today?
Do you long to be creative again? Doodle for 10 minutes, rearrange your living room, grab an adult coloring book.
Looking for a promotion or different position? Explore job listings. Ask a higher level question or reach out to one person that could help.
Have you been putting off a health journey? Park at the far end of the parking lot and walk. Put more veggies than meat on your plate tonight. Stretch before bed.
Is there a book or a business in you waiting to be birthed? Spend an hour in a bookstore. Write one sentence, yep just one. Look up a similar business and ask yourself what you would do differently. Imagine your product/book/service in someone’s hand.
I’d love to know what piece of your vision you can engage in, comment with an idea.
It would be total “fake news” to say I went from procrastination and feeling stuck to serving powerhouse women without support. I needed (and still get) encouragement, I received guidance and accountability, and I depended on my mentors and like-minded community.
I am inviting you to experience this and more inside of my 9 month Group Experience: Alchemy – The Feminine Formula for Authentic Success.
We begin in less than 2 weeks so doors will be closing soon.
Alchemy includes my signature system, action & support so you can:
Clarify what you are meant to do and which path has the most grace & ease for your life.
Shift your mindset into a feminine & personal idea of success that expands you but is achievable in the near future.
Finally create a plan with well-thought out steps, accountability and guidance while you are taking action.
The invitation begins with a application process. If you feel a bit of excitement, a little scared and a lot of: This is what I need!Click here to fill out an application ❤
A memory of my father came to me the other day as I contemplated my vision for 2020: The amount of people I’d like to touch with my message, the women’s lives that will be transformed as a result of my coaching & community, the trips we want to take our kids on, the amazing health I want to experience, the good we can do with an upsurge of income…
The picture that popped in my head was of myself and my little brother on the floor in front of the TV. I don’t remember what we were watching but I do remember the intense fear I felt at what was on the screen. I must’ve screamed, put my hands over my eyes or started to run away because my dad grabbed my arms, put his face in front of mine and said, “Look! Watch this.” He reached over to the television (yes good people, it was before remote controls, or at least before we had one lol), and switched it off. He looked at us and said:
“It isn’t real. It isn’t there anymore. What you were scared of isn’t real.”
Although I was relieved in the moment, my little stubborn Taurus mind thought, yeah easy for you to say daddy, wait until I try to go to sleep tonight! And that night, in true little kid form, the images I saw earlier came to haunt me. Guess what allowed me to go to sleep? I kept reminding myself that it just isn’t real.
Fast forward to today when the images that show up aren’t of ghosts and monsters (although when I think of certain tragedies and detained children☹), but of failure, disappointment, lack or the changes that success bring. Sound familiar?
Now, I know the spiritual reasons and brain science behind why these fears persist and why more than anything else they halt our flight. My father gave me a tool decades ago that I’ve used to take risks, defy stereotypes and elevate higher than poor little Black girls from the hood are expected to. Just like I did when thinking about the heights I plan on reaching in the years to come, I told myself, Kysha, the fears aren’t real. Yes, I do the work that stops me from repressing emotions or bypassing what comes up AND I remind myself of the truth.
“Of all the liars in the world, sometimes the worst are our own fears.” — Rudyard Kipling
Not unlike that TV show I watched in childhood, our fears are made up stories of frightening scenarios that have not happened. Stories of “what if” and “suppose..”. Here’s the clincher: It doesn’t matter if it has happened to you in the past or to someone else! The episode you’re watching in your mind is based on the future – future circumstances, future time, future you – and it DOES NOT EXIST.
You’ll be told no if you ask – not real
People won’t buy your stuff – not real
You won’t find love – not real
You’ll fail – not real
It won’t last – not real
You’ll have to go back – not real
You’ll lose friends and be alone – not real
You don’t have what it takes – not real
I bet some of you are like I was as a child: yeah easy for you say. I still say it too lol! I get it. Future scenario or not, sometimes the monster seems so real it won’t leave us alone. I’m going to let you in on an ancient-Kysha-secret. In those cases, I invite fear along for the ride! I say, “Look Fear, I’m taking the next step. If you won’t leave, then dammit, sit down and strap in! I’m going on this journey with you in tow”.
Acknowledge that you will be scared, often the whole damn time. The secret is, you can move WITH fear. Fear monsters get carsick! They are stronger and scarier in stagnation. When you are in motion, Fear will lower it’s voice, shrink in size and struggle to keep form.
Tweet this: “Fear gains power with stagnation and shrinks with motion. Move, even if it’s one step!”
Comment and let me know. The year is almost over, are you switching your fear to off or inviting it along?
I’ve decided to continue showcasing the incredible work that some of the women in the Elevate Your NOW community are doing. Enjoy, be inspired, follow and support!
Both of these amazing women received guidance around Clarity and Courage to step into the next chapter of their lives! I’m awed by their brilliance and impact in their communities. Restorative justice advocate Kusum Crimmel and Jewelry designer & motivational speaker Corinthia Peoples.
In honor of the whole year it’s been of missing him: Thank you for your lessons daddy ❤
I’ve experienced this literally & figuratively! Have you?
As some of you that have been following me or have been to any of my events this year may know, I had the first serious injury of my life in January. I experienced the disorienting and painful complete rupture of my right Achilles Tendon during a run-of-the-mill kickboxing training. This year-long healing process has been (and still is) both arduous and full of beautiful lessons.
One moment that has permanently lodged itself in my memory, was the doctor’s visit to get my purple (because Prince) cast removed. My excitement at seeing this awkward, heavy thing finally buzz-sawed off my leg was quickly replaced by devastation. The doctor asked me, quite casually, to move my foot and… I COULD NOT. Did you read that correctly? Because I couldn’t believe it. I’ve been a gym rat all my life, danced professionally all over the country, love any kind of movement and even though my brain sent the signal MOVE, my foot was still. Unmoving. Motionless. I’m tearing up just thinking about it.
In a moment I want you to close your eyes. Dissolve the image of the purple cast and my unresponsive foot. When was the last time YOU wanted with every fiber of your body to move forward, you KNEW you were ready, it was finally time, and you could not get yourself to move from where you were to where you wanted to be?
Perhaps it was:
Consistently showing up for a workout/class you already paid for
Offering your services at a price you know you deserve
Committing to eating in a way your heart/joints/blood pressure would appreciate
Allowing yourself to be open to a new relationship… in a new way
Starting the project/venture you’ve been dreaming about
Finishing your book, that followup email, the call to ask for a promotion, umm finishing anything!
All forward motion and/or growth requires an inner movement first. It can also be devastating to remain immobile internally. Instead of being unable to see movement physically, you feel the decay of stagnation.
I’ve said many times that I don’t teach, advise or coach my community in anything I haven’t used or live as a way of life. One of the many tools I pulled out of my bedazzled, brightly colored toolbelt to get me through these months of healing is the tool of Permission.
(Word nerd here) The root of the word Permission is broken down in two parts: forward & to let loose, let go
Often when we can’t move, it’s because we’re subconsciously holding tight to an identity we no longer want and haven’t had permission to move. Permission for you, by you! I don’t mean simply telling yourself yes, but a deep look into the empty space you are planning to occupy and what it’ll take to get there. I had to do this again & again when relearning to walk on 2 feet!
Without Permission you
Think being comfortable (even in pain) is better than the unknown
Allow yourself to stay scared spit-less of what’s ahead
Remain blind to the support, resources & skills you already have
Can’t assess whether it’s worth it to take the next step
Trick yourself into remaining powerless & unnecessarily fragile
Forget who you are – your Divine self
I remember the first step I took without crutches. Knowing how strong I am, how connected I am, I still was almost in tears with fear when my physical therapist suggested that I try. I looked at her with what I’m sure had to be a six year old’s face on the first day of school and you know happened? She held her hand out, I grasped it and walked. Without stumbling, a re-rupture, or pain of any sort. I was shocked and so grateful!
I’d like to hold a hand out to you right now. Join me for a breakthrough coaching session on Friday (info below) or reach out personally for an intro to giving yourself permission here.
Friday October 18th at 530pm. This is a breakthrough coaching sessionguiding you into giving yourself Permission to Succeed.Join on time for the opportunity for personal coaching with Kysha!Click here to sign up
I’ve decided to continue the pleasure I felt at Activate Your Calling when showcasing the incredible work that some of the women in the Elevate Your NOW community are doing. Enjoy, be inspired, follow and support!
Sonia Russell has spent years making events run with more ease and efficiency than the producers ever thought possible through her events services business, World Meetings by Sonia. The Urban Mindfulness Summit is being brought to life by Sonia & her amazing Imagining Justice partners-in-love. You’ll enjoy an uplifting concert with Rickie Byars along with impact strategies from some of the best minds & hearts of the West Coast (including yours truly)! Click here to learn more and grab the early bird price!
